So after processing yesterday I came to a very deep understanding I wish to share.
It pertains to our very natures, and the Gods we serve.
I have been seeing that we cant escape our very nature, and I feel that equates with our Ego.
As I believe our Ancestral Gods were indeed living people once, how they lived is in our Natures.
For example the Jountun were the indigenous peoples of the early landscapes, then the Vanir were those who still revered the wild places, yet they learned to harness the land and animals for thier own use.
Then came the Aesir, the folk of civilization, domination and war, and it’s with them we began to loose our connection with our Nature which is why Odin saw the need to be taught that connection through Freyas Earth magic, as he saw that disconnect would ultimately bring about Ragnarok.
All of us reclaiming Forn Sed are approaching it from our very natures, our Egos, to remember the old ways as best we can through our Ancestral faction of Gods we descend from.
So if you being Odins kin, you will look to the cerebral way, the way of civilization and thought, where as I as Jountun kin must do things in a wild manner with much mud, sky, trees and sensations.
All factions were Warriors in thier own ways, as to survive we must learn to fight, however fighting for wild folk isn’t for the love of war as it is with the civilized ones.
That goes for our magics too; Jountun and Vanir blood knows how to work with the surrounding environment within our very nature, so our seidr is wild, dirty, and uses every once of us.
Aesir descendants tend to use magics that have much pomp and ceremony, rich with man made tradition and theater.
One is not better than the other, and to let the dogma we are to kill our egos, our very natures, doesn’t sit right with me.
I realized I can no sooner superceded my wildness than I can lopp off my own arm.
Yes I can conform my nature to fit into society somewhat, but there lies the crux; how far can any human go, even adept seidr folk to try to control and change their very nature, but more importantly why should they?
The wounds and scars we hold must be healed and addressed as that is the point of human life, but to try to squash, hide, or escape our very natures due to societal pressures I cannot abide by.
I truly wonder if this simple thing is what’s so wrong with our world?
For 2000 years everyone is being asked to change their very natures to fit in a world wide civilization, and in doing so only the dominant society which rules at the time gets to say who we are, how we act, what we think or when we can behave in any situation.
Perhaps I’m delusional, but being a self sovereign Heathen Volva means to me I have become one with my true Nature and I dont seek to quite my inner voice and understanding of self known as Ego.
I will always work to be a better human and leave the place better than when I found it, however I will never again apologize, or feel less than or weakened, simply because I do as I was born to do; which is to live fully within my nature and do it with honor to my Ancestral Gods and my very core self.